Many of my regular readers get a sadistic delight in returning to my previous articles, finding one of my wildly inaccurate predictions, and then cutting and pasting it in an e-mail to me. Now they will have even more fodder.
The Steelers will win the Super Bowl. Both the Patriots and Steelers will make short work of their playoff opponents, making the AFC championship game the de facto Super Bowl. The Steelers are firing on all cylinders now with the Three B’s – Ben, Brown and Bell – healthy and primed. There will be some stressful moments though – such as when the referees on Belichick’s payroll call pass interference for looking cross-eyed at Gronkowski or when they call unnecessary roughness for hitting the whining Brady with a feather duster – but the Steelers will prevail. The quiche-eating winner of the NFC title game will be irrelevant.
The Republicans will hold the House and pick up Senate seats. The liberal Patriot fans will have another reason to wash down their Prozac with Chardonnay in November. The Democrats have been salivating over their wins in Alabama and Virginia, but these occurred before the Republicans kept their campaign promises of cutting taxes and gutting Obamacare. The battle is now joined.
The interminable Mueller investigation will continue unless President Trump has the sense to fire him. I am not sure what Mueller will come up with – obstruction of justice, money laundering, sexual harassment, having bad hair – but he will come up with something. Thus, the 2018 mid-terms will become a referendum on whether President Trump should be impeached. But with the economy booming, unemployment among minorities at record lows, ISIS destroyed and the Republican base satisfied, the Democrats will have a tough sell. As one of the millennials I play basketball with put it, “I don’t like Trump but I love seeing my 401K go up.” You liberal Patriot fans might want to renew your Prozac prescriptions and pick up a case of Marcassin Chardonnay. 2005 was a good year.
The stock market will gain at least another 10%. While President Trump loves his populist rhetoric, the financial shots are being called by Goldman Sachs cronies – Treasurer Secretary Steven Mnuchin and chief economic advisor Gary Cohn, who are experts at keeping the rich rich. President Trump’s appointment of Yellen acolyte, Jerome Powell, as the head of the Federal Reserve indicates that the low interest rate policy will continue, thus making the stock market the only game in town. The bubble will burst someday – it always does – but not in 2018.
The mullahs are going down. The proud Iranian people are tired of living under a corrupt theocracy and are now rebelling. These mullahs were propped up by the naïve President Obama’s deal, who gave them access to their $100 billion in return for basically nothing. Rather than improve the lot of the average Iranian, the mullahs are using this money to pursue their nuclear ambitions and fund foreign adventures. Inflation is rampant and unemployment among the youth is rife. The revolts will continue until a more secular government comes into power.
North Korea will be brought under control. The advantage of having a bully like Donald Trump as president is that he can recognize a fellow bully, such as North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un. President Trump understands that Kim Jong Un will only respond to a fist to his face, not make nice discussions with feckless Ivy League diplomats in horned-rimmed glasses. With the advice of Defense Secretary Mattis (Don’t you love having a Defense Secretary with the nickname of Mad Dog?), President Trump either will push the sanctions far enough that Kim Jong Un is neutered, or do a surgical military strike. Our defense establishment has concluded that allowing North Korea the ability to dust our cities is simply intolerable.